Personal growth is a hot topic these days. More people are searching for ways to grow themselves than ever before.

For me, it’s always been a path I’ve been on. Ever since I was a kid. I’ve always been super driven to succeed at anything I try.

I remember my mom telling me well into my teen years that when I was a toddler trying to do a board puzzle, if I couldn’t get the piece to fit just right, I would sit there and yell at it and cry, but refused to stop until I completed it. It’s interesting how the thought process in small things like that, shape who we become as adults.

I’ve always been driven to move forward and better myself in any area. I’ve always seen life as one giant learning session that never ends. I’ll never get to a point and say “I did it. I’m finally perfect.”. I will never be perfect, but I know I will spend my entire life learning as much as I can about myself and trying to be the best version of myself all the time.

I’ve been made fun of for years, because of the amount of things I’m good at. I don’t try and be good at everything, nor do I ever boast about it. It just happens when subjects come up and I pipe up and say “I can do that”, I’ve had people roll their eyes and reply “What can’t you do?”, as someone else chimes in “No really, she’s actually really good at that!”. It’s not my fault! I’ve just always put 100% effort into whatever it is that I’m doing because I don’t like to fail. I will work as hard as I need to, in order to succeed. Failure is when you give up and stop trying, and that just isn’t in my nature. The downside of being highly driven, is knowing when to say “enough”, and also that I have found it difficult sticking to one thing for long periods. Once I feel like I’ve mastered something and there’s no more room to grow, I become bored, and need to move on to the next thing to put all my efforts into. Part of that though, is that I don’t think I’ve ever pursued something I truly love. I’m definitely working on that chapter of my life right now though!

Trying to figure out what my “grown up” job in life has always been difficult for me, because there’s so many things that interest me! I’m very creative, so some things on my list of ideas to pursue have been: a music career- my page linked here, wedding photography, a home decor business (which I have run for several years and put on pause a while ago- linked here if you want to have a look), being a realtor, professional network marketer, opening my own restaurant, writing a book, being a Lyft driver, and speaking of driving, I’m pretty sure I missed my calling to be a professional race car driver. The list goes on! I’ve had a tough time picking only one thing to pursue! Especially like I said, once I get going at something and get to the point of feeling like I’ve mastered it, I lose interest. Can anyone relate?

The one really good thing about being highly driven, is that I love personal growth. I believe that there is something to be learned in every situation, regardless of what it is. Even in seemingly negative circumstances, I will try to take something away from every situation. Thinking about what I could have done better, or what I can learn from it. I don’t want to ever be arrogant or prideful and think I’m some amazing person who has “arrived”. I have learned to accept my mistakes and analyze them to figure out what I can do better in the future.

I have to say, personal growth is not always pleasant. Being forced to look at yourself with a magnifying glass and realizing there might be some ugly stuff in there you need to deal with, is not very comfortable. Owning up to your shortcomings and mistakes is not easy, either. Especially when you go back to the people you hurt or let down, and start owning up to things and making it right.

However, growth is always rewarding. It doesn’t matter who you are, when you step outside of your comfort zone and make effort to grow as a person, not only does it cause you to be more self aware, but it also makes you a happier person. I heard a quote once “Happiness is an inside job“, and it has stuck with me for many years. It’s so completely true. Happiness doesn’t come from our outside circumstances, but from being happy with ourselves. I can guarantee that if you aren’t doing anything to work on yourself (whether physical, mental, emotional), you aren’t going to be truly happy with yourself.

Learning to love yourself is a process and not an easy one for a lot of people. It’s been nice to see in recent years that things like positive body image, and accepting people for who they are, instead of putting people into molds, has been the more widely advertised and prevalent attitude.

It’s also interesting that people are seeking to grow themselves more than ever before. Things like health and nutrition, as well as fitness, have really ramped up in recent years as well. I think we have gotten to the point where we realize we need to take care of our bodies, and enjoy how that feels.

Anyone that knows me, knows that I can’t stand complacency. That’s probably why I’m so highly driven to grow and move forward in life. If you’re not growing, then you are stale. And if you are stale, and comfortable.. I don’t know if you can honestly say that you are fully happy with who you are.

It’s like with relationships. If you are in a relationship and you never put any effort into it, it will die. Relationships take work from both people to survive. Sometimes a lot of work. If you don’t water plants, they will die. People are the same. We need to put effort into our own health, in order to grow and be healthy people.

Being healthy is much more than what we put in our bodies, it’s also what we allow into our minds. There has been such a focus on mental health in recent years and that’s a good thing, because I don’t think people wanted to acknowledge in the past, that it’s actually something we need to do.

I can tell you from experience, the people you surround yourself with and allow into your life will have a direct impact on who you are as a person. I’ve always used the analogy of a healthy person on a chair, and an unhealthy person standing on the floor. Is it easier for the person standing on the chair to pull up the person on the floor, or for them to pull the healthy person down off the chair? The answer is the latter.

I’ll write more about surrounding yourself with good people in a later post, but I think personal growth is one of the best and most important things you can do for yourself, and those around you.

I’m very analytical, sometimes to my demise because I pick things apart and analyze them to death, which I’m learning to do in a healthy way. Being self analytical is the worst.. but it is also good because I am always keeping myself in check and trying to figure out why I feel a certain way.

These are some of the things I ask myself:

Is it because of the current circumstance? Is it because I’m overly emotional? Are my hormones heightened right now? Am I just having a bad day? Is something else that’s going on in my life affecting how I feel about this situation? Am I letting past issues filter how I see things today? Am I preventing my own happiness in this situation? Does fear play a part in this?

I think it’s important to keep yourself in check and figure out what makes you tick. Learning how to listen to yourself, be authentic, and not apologize for your needs and standing up for what’s important to you, are some of the best things you can do for yourself.

This is an excellent ted talk from Mel Robbins, which I encourage everyone to watch.

There is plenty of help out there if you are seeking it. From Ted Talks, to other articles on the subject. The resources for personal growth are endless. My challenge to you is to ask yourself, “Am I truly happy with myself as I am today?”and “Do I love myself?”.

If the answer is no, then spend some time thinking about what you want out of life if there was nothing holding you back….and if you’re not holding yourself back. Who do you want to be as a person? What do you want people to remember and say about you years down the road? From there, take steps- they don’t have to be big ones- to move forward. Start with something small. Start putting positive things into your mind. Speak positivity into being. Write positive things about yourself or who you want to be, on index cards and put them around the house so you are reminded to think about yourself differently when you see them. Put as much positivity into your mind as you can.. I promise that you will start to think differently over time.

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