Finding Motivation and Keeping it

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Motivation and being motivated is a tough topic, because I think it’s something we all struggle with.

How many people are motivated at the end of December to get gym memberships come January 1st, only to go a few times, fall off the wagon, and go “Oh well, I had good intentions.”? Come on, let’s be honest. The reason we plan to go to the gym in January, is so that we can eat like pigs the entire month of December (it’s not normal to eat that much cheese!) and console ourselves by saying we’re going to work it off in January. Am I right?

Digging into the word motivation, as per good ol’ Wikipedia:

Motivation is the experience of desire or aversion (you want something, or want to avoid or escape something). As such, motivation has both an objective aspect (a goal or thing you aspire to) and an internal or subjective aspect (it is you that wants the thing or wants it to go away) “

Hmm. The experience of desire. So if we desire something, why don’t we keep desiring it bad enough to stay motivated to get whatever it is we want?

I think I can answer for everyone, to say that we are the reason. We are the ones holding ourselves back. Every day we have a choice. Are we going to push through our feelings, or are we going to succumb to them? Feelings are misleading. They come and go, and we can’t rely on them. You can be caught in the moment, feeling burning anger toward your partner and feel like ending the relationship, but the next morning feel differently. You can’t base decisions on feelings unless they stay consistent. Which I will talk about in a later post.

I was dedicated to fitness and strict meal plans for 3 years. I saw results, felt great about myself, and was passionate about it. However, I cannot count the amount of times I’d be in the middle of a workout and be saying to myself “Why am I doing this?!” “I hate this so much”and “WHO ACTUALLY ENJOYS THIS?!?”. Afterward I’d feel great and think, “I’m so glad I pushed through that!”. If I based fitness around my feelings, I’d probably be happier eating ice cream scrolling through the fitness people I follow on Instagram and aspire to be like them one day.

I appreciate that motivation is a desire to do something, but I don’t believe that it’s just a feeling that all of a sudden hits us and makes us do things. We have to take action when we experience that desire, otherwise the idea will pass, and we will go back into comfort mode.

So how do we “find” motivation then? I think it goes back to figuring out what you want. There’s a lot of people out there that have buried the things that they want or desire, and don’t allow themselves to even acknowledge them anymore, let alone do anything about it. It’s amazing the amount of excuses that we can come up with to prevent ourselves from doing something. Usually those excuses all have the same thing in common for every person. They are all about other things or people. We will come up with every possible thing other than ourselves, as being the reason for not being able to do something. Ever thought about that?

What if we are the ones who have to motivate ourselves, by deciding what it is we want to do, and taking action toward it, and then the motivation will follow? Quite honestly, I think we “lack” motivation, when we are trying to do something we don’t actually care about doing. When you are doing something for the wrong reason, usually for someone else, or to be someone you’re not, that’s when you have the trouble sticking to doing something. We are going against our own grain!

I think we need to spend more time on ourselves, figuring out what it is we want out of life, and who we want to be. Then when we finally are ready to make the change, it will last. If something is important to you, you will dedicate yourself to it, and have the attitude that failure is not an option.

I go through spurts now with my fitness level. It’s definitely not where it used to be or where I’d like it to be and plan on getting back to that point, but a lot of that has to do with my love of food. I’m always at war with myself. Love being fit, or love eating all the deliciousness om nom nom.

I will also go through times where I lack motivation. Where I stop taking action and it’s noticeable. One of the first things that gets noticed as a telltale sign I’m wrestling internally, is that the kitchen stops being immaculately clean. The kitchen is my sanctuary as I love to cook and bake (another one of my hobbies, as mentioned on my previous entry), and I keep a pretty darn clean house, so if you show up and it’s messy, you know there’s something up with me.

I always recognize that it’s 100% my issue, and a choice that I’ve made to stop doing whatever it is I am wanting or supposed to be doing. I have to force myself out of my comfort zone, to take action to do whatever it is that I want to do. Do I like cleaning my house? Sometimes. I do find it therapeutic, especially when I’m upset. However, it’s more the results afterward that motivate me to do it.

It would then be safe to say that we are more motivated for the end result, not only for the process of getting there. I know that’s not the case for everyone, as there are people who enjoy being uncomfortable during the process.

The question you have to ask yourself is “How badly do I want the end result?”. I think that answer will determine your success rate and whether or not you stick to it.

Thomas Edison, made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. When a reporter asked, “How did it feel to fail 1,000 times?” Edison replied, “I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.”

Thomas, along with other successful people all have one thing in common. Failure is not an option. To fail means to give up and to stop trying. You can’t fail if you continue to work on the thing you want.

Like I said, if you want something badly enough, you will have the motivation to keep at it, because that in itself is the motivation. So what, you had a bad day and feel like you failed the day? Pick yourself up tomorrow and try again. Don’t let negative thoughts creep in and talk to yourself negatively. You can do anything you set your mind to. You just have to have this mantra on repeat in your head: “Don’t think, just do”. I think you’ll be pleased with the results.

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Hi! My name is Elizabeth and I'm a stay at home mom to my 2 daughters, and a blogger.
I've been an entrepreneur and business owner since I was 17, and also record and produce music.
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